I did not sign up for

This is not what I signed up for

This place with its mushy middle,

Curly top, and heart that's cold and vulnerable.

This is not what I signed up for

Bloody wars that leaves this place crippled; red flowing freely down parted lanes.

This is not what I signed up for

The enability to breath as

Others crush into just one of the

More vital parts of this place.

I did not sign on to this body

Riddled with disease

To be ignored and beaten down.

I did not sign on to this body 

With tearful eyes

A mouth that will not stop smiling

While laughter bubbles to the top without end, and the heart below breaks even as it tries to harden itself; as the lungs grasp for just one more breath, and legs buckle 

As a steady stream of blood flows unforgiving to the floor.
This is not what I signed up for

-jay 🌸